Can I Just Say... "I told you so!!!"

When I speak of self-management during a home remodel, I get two primary responses. One group, having had at least one home-remodel under their belt responds enthusiastically. They get it immediately. Let’s face it, remodelling one’s home is a pivotal life-experience because it touches every aspect of day-to-day life.

Even if you believe you were born to remodel, you might ask yourself why you feel that way. Is it about the creative process? A new challenge? The coveted feeling of feeling of accomplishment or legacy? To put a fine point on it, where is the rush for you?

Maybe part of the excitement has something to do with the magnitude of the project? It is a big one; that is certain! It’s pivotal... any way you slice it; whether you can’t wait to engage or whether you go into it with dread. Like any major surgery, especially to the house that is our home, we voluntarily open ourselves up to feelings of vulnerability on every major field from budget to beauty.

What’s more, you- the homeowner, is usually not a builder. And if this is your first time, you have not ever lived through a substantial home make-over; particularly if you plan to live in your home during the event.

Prepare to feel astonished if you are not properly prepared. The first and most obvious astonishments you will face are:

1. the length of time it actually takes to complete. Even if it is completed in six months and on time, you will be amazed at how long six months will feel.
2. the money it will actually cost to go from what you can afford to what you actually want. Try not to make your professional team responsible for upping the budget if you are asking for changes that reflect more of what you want rather than what your plans specify. This happens all too often, and no one walks away feeling good about it.
3. the day-to-day impact on your life and relationships.

If all else fails, you might just let everyone know you may be a little off for a few months. But, to just love you through it and you will eventually return with bells on. What are true friends for if not to hold your place while you step out of line, right?

It doesn’t take Einstein to figure out that anyone about to remodel would gain hugely from an opportunity for candid (no B.S.) tools for self-management, and some get-real advice. After all, if stepping over the human equation during critical times actually worked, there would be far fewer stories of turbulence, deep fatigue, and even divorce during major home re-construction.

However, because we as an industry have only just begun to examine this previously ignored component of home-renovation, the other half of folks I talk to (about self-care and personal management tools), naively wonders if all the emotional hoop-la is really true. They wonder, that is, until they are knee deep in their own hoop-la... if you know what I mean.

However, if you are properly and personally prepared, and you have given yourself the gift of a short course in getting-real about remodelling, you will be far less likely to be thrown off your warm centre than most.

The main question then becomes, how do you prepare; how can you find the tools to get you and your family through it elegantly and with unusual grace for a first-timer?

When the pressure mounts, and you are squeezed somewhere between the kids, their summer vacation, the stress of semi-camping for months on end, work as usual, and the whole remodel-thingy , increasing budgets and extending completion dates, and you are gaging on having to make even one more finish selection... you may find yourself fantasizing heavily about driving south until the gas in your tank runs out.

Here is a link (below) to a recent article in San Francisco Magazine. It is an interview with designer Rachelle Goodfriend who speaks on the subject very broadly. She is yet another professional who has decided to pay attention to this aspect of home renovation and give it its due. If you or anyone you know is remodelling or thinking about remodelling, help them out. Tell them about Remodelling Couples. We specialize in helping you plan strategy around planned chaos, and keeping the personal ovation in your home-renovation.

We have an opportunity to change the way we think about remodelling, even how we approach our project as a whole story. It is absolutely possible to expect a better experience than you might have guessed. Keep your eyes open, and your curiosity informed. You decide...Enjoy the article linked below, and I invite you to email me your comments or questions. http://www.sanfranmag.com/story/couples-couch